She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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