I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
