Will you blow on my dice?
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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