O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize