not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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