yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize