Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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