Taylor Swift is so right about you.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
