Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
