walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she smelled like a LAN party
no you cant smoke seaweed
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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