Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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