I'm going to rape someone's good day.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Randomize
