none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
