Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
as a side note pls kill me
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
