The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
