you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize