found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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