Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
