They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
