I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
