yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
