There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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