so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
