if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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