im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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