how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize