So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize
