Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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