i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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