Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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