I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
