he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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