I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize