u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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