Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize