what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
