We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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