??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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