Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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