Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
