is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Randomize
