yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
