Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize