Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
