Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
