Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize
