Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
