dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
