Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
