so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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